everyone should be asleep

We should all be sleeping. Not all the time. Now. It's 2:50am Pacific Standard Time. We should all be asleep now. Ok, everyone in the U.S. If you're in a country where it's 2:50pm, you should not be asleep. Unless you're napping. Napping is decadent and magnificent.

But it's close to 3am and I'm up, having made great (meaning large, grand, many) plans for today. I planned to complete unpleasant and/or boring tasks today. Yesterday. I had brunch. I got a scarf and a shirt at a thrift store on Mission. I'm wearing the scarf. It is cream and brown with a chevron pattern. Brown is my favorite color to wear and chevron is one of my favorite patterns. The shirt is blue.

My friend had this thing called a Groupon and we got this ridiculously huge brunch that costs $60 for $30. We had to pick many items. It became painful. We had pumpkin pancakes with some kind of bourbon marmalade and maple syrup. Fabulous. Three types of bread - a jalapeno cornbread, some kind of scone, and a ham biscuit, macaroni and cheese spring rolls. Oh, no. We're not done yet. Then there's the crispy chicken sandwich with kale chips. And, dear lord I totally forgot, the pumpkin bread pudding. We took large boxes home. We didn't eat any of the sandwich and left that poor bread pudding virtually untouched. I wish I had it now. We had Bloody Marys, too.

Not to go on about brunch, but one last little thing is a former Top Chef contestant is the chef at this place, so I got all geeked out and asked if he would come say hi. I love Top Chef more than anything. Anything televised, I mean. You know what I meant. Anyway, he didn't come over, but that was ok. I was just going to be a cooking show nerd and say I loved you on Top Chef! And he'd go, thanks and go back to the kitchen and maybe feel bad that he didn't win. A fun fact about my love of competitive cooking shows (Chopped, Hell's Kitchen, Master Chef, I could go on ...) is that I don't cook. I can. I have. But I don't. Because I am one person and I'm sort of lazy and I like cooking as an activity. But I really do love the hell out of that show.

One other fun fact is that the book that my book will be in is now on sale for pre-order right here! My book is called Things About Me and You and the whole book is called Shut Up/Look Pretty. It will be out in January from Tiny Hardcore Press. I didn't expect for this to happen. I was very fortunate. And two close friends and two other friends I don't know as well also have books in this book, and I believe it will be kind of great.

Writing has gotten kind of weird. I don't submit as much and people ask for things and I don't write as often, and I don't want to let people down or lose opportunities. So I am here instead of writing those things or being asleep. I am a super-genius.

The fall issue of Corium came out! It is wonderful - wonderful writing and art. I am lucky to do this. I am lucky to feature such wonders. I love it and will keep Corium alive as long as it will stay alive, which I hope is a long time. Sometimes I wonder if editing other people's wonderful work is impeding my own writing progress. Then I think, no, it isn't. I am lucky and if I don't write, it is because I am distracted by things I don't love. So please read the issue and love it like I do.

I wrote this thing for The Nervous Breakdown about being present during my friend's vasectomy. Someone said it was sick. I don't get it. Unusual? Yes. Deviant? No. I was his ride, then I was his support. We're friends. I care. No sickness there.

It is 3:36am. Seriously. Go to bed.